"By adopting a child and helping them reach their potential, they help us reach ours. An adopted child is not an unwanted child; to the contrary. They are a child who was searched for, prayed for, cried for, begged for; received by arms that ached, making empty hearts full. Love is meant to be shared." Author unknown

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

10 days yet to go and a Reality check....

I'm hitting the part of this journey where I'm really beginning to be homesick.  I miss my husband, kids, friends, church and a regular routine.  I am thankful to have my mom and aunt here but it's just not the same. I don't believe I've ever been homesick before but then again, I've never been away from my whole family for more than a few days - nor have two new children who need lots of me right now and there's not enough of me for both of them, all the time. 

I don't know how our military people do it for the extended periods that they do.  I have a new found respect for them and my stay is short term.  God bless them for all they suffer for our freedom.  Thank you!

The days have become tougher with two, two year old.  Tegan's fits of anger for not getting his way or being removed from a situation have become more frequent and comforting him has become more difficult.  He whiny cried for about 30 minutes straight this morning. My holding him did not comfort him, only made him more mad so after about 10 minutes I set him on the bed.  Grandma tried to cheer him up but that too only made him madder.  He seems to whined down as time goes . I eventually went back over, picked him up and asked him if he was finished, then he was fine. 

Tegan and Corban do not yet interact with each other.  Tegan likes to make sure I know what Corban is doing in case it is something he shouldn't be doing.  Tegan is not a fan of Corban playing with a toy he has finished playing with, this can trigger Tegan walking up to Corban and swiping it out of his hands.  Corban doesn't really respond to Tegan doing this. 

Today, Corban threw his first fit.  Not really sure what it was over but he plopped himself onto his bottom and then back onto the floor.  I finished fixing his bottle, scooped him up, laid him on the bed with the bottle and he was fine. Yay, bottle number 2 today and it's only lunch time!

Reality - I have concerns about Corban, mostly that he is so far behind but that is not his fault.  I checked with the Corban's Orphanage Yahoo group about my concerns and they confirmed that what he presents is typical behavior of a child from his orphanage.  At 29 months, he has never had anything but a bottle of formula mixed with rice cereal to eat.  He refused all food that approaches his mouth.  The few small things I have gotten into his mouth come right back out.  He does not know how to suck a bottle just knows to chew on the nipple and the thin paste will come out.  This is because orphanages cute holes into the tips of the nipples so they can feed them thickened formula via the bottle.  I tried to mix baby food, juice and rice cereal yesterday and he wanted nothing to do with that bottle.  Most kids would eat up something sweet like that but he's ok with bland.

We will likely have to treat his feeding like he's 6 months old and continue to try and introduce new things to him.  Hopefully it won't take long for him to catch up.

Corban is smart and catches on fast but has some bad habits, probably due to his needs not being met.  He hits his head on things, repeatedly, pulls at his hair (therefore, he has several bald spots) and startles at quick movements.  His head has many lumps and bumps on it - I will never know why.  I hope many of them are temporary and go away.  My heart cries for this little boy and all the attention he has lacked over his two and a half years.  He weighs about 22 lbs according to the scale here in the room, Tegan weighs about 29 and they are almost the same height. 

Corban was finally comfortable enough yesterday to walk and we discovered yet another issue we will likely need to address.  He walks with his feet turned out, using mostly the insides of his feet which makes him unbalance.  He often walks like he is drunk but, it does not slow him down.

Corban is going to talk a lot of TLC, I am thankful that God planned for me to meet Tegan first so I had a few days to bond with him before meeting Corban.  Though Tegan still needs me, he had a good bond going with me and therefore, I can pay a little more attention to Corban's needs. I am also thankful that my husband will be here in about 48 hours and this should make much of this a little easier.

Please pray for Corban, that he will come out of his shell and begin to open up to eating some "real" food.  Even baby food would be a start.

Thank you all for your continued blessings.


  1. I just prayed for them both. Also, praying for you and your husband as you work to mend hearts and get through the walls that are built up.

  2. Continued prayers for the entire Downey family!


Pictures of our Journey to bring Tegan and Corban home!